The father and mother, before anyone else, are responsible for raising their children, and the foundations for building all future patterns of education lie in their hands... The child who does not really hear and who has an emotional mind ready to accept any type of education derives his ideals and models from the elders of the family and acquires his morals from them.
Did you, my dear father and mother, in that sensitive stage, the stage of my weakness and ignorance, perform your duties? Did you practice Islamic and religious behavior with family members? Did you avoid lying, hypocrisy, betrayal, immorality, and profane speech? Were you both practicing good Islamic behavior and getting used to it? Did you act on what you say so that your actions support your words? Or did you both act contrary to what you said, and your words became pictures drawn on the surface of the water?
Freedom or violence
Some parents think that the child should be given complete freedom to do what he wants, even if his action is not appropriate, and to go wherever he wants, and to any gathering, even if that place is a hotbed of corruption and deviation. This type of upbringing is wrong and leads to deviation, fluidity, and degeneracy in the child. Because he never finds resistance in exchange for achieving the good or bad things he desires, he grows into a quick-tempered person who requires rest and laziness, and this is what causes him to lack intellectual growth and spiritual maturity.
On the other hand some think that the best method of education is being be as violent as he can, as there is a painful beating for every mistake made by the child, and every type of guidance and direction must be accompanied by a nervous outburst, shouting, and obscene words, just as a person stands before an unjust judicial investigator to confess a heinous crime. They also believe that views that demand the benefit of the child must be accompanied by screaming and violence, as if the father is a high-ranking military commander issuing his orders on the battlefront to his soldiers...
The result of this method is nothing but the destruction of the child’s personality, preventing the buds of his preparations from sprouting, creating a contemptible complex in the child’s soul.
Did you know that this excessiveness and negligence in raising children was not acceptable? Did you know that the style of Islam contradicts the two approaches? Did you know that Islam says: The child must be given freedom in some matters, and firmness is limited to certain other matters?
Dear mothers and fathers If you had become familiar with the moral and educational issues in Islam, paid attention to them, and acted accordingly, you would have been able to strengthen the doctrinal and moral foundations of your children, and you would have been able, after framing the family atmosphere with love, equality, and harmony, to sow love, affection, and moral virtues in the hearts of the children, and raise them as true Muslims.
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