Family educators and psychological scholars are almost unanimous in saying that beating is an improper measure against children, and that it causes psychological damage that negatively affects the development of children and their personalities.

Specialists describe hitting as violence towards children, and parents and educators must stop it. This perception is largely correct, but removing beating from the list of disciplinary means completely is an inaccurate perception! There is a difference between beating for the purpose of discipline and violence!

There are cases in which the educator must use disciplinary beating that is not seriously harmful. To direct a quarrelsome or stubborn child; because disciplinary beating contributes effectively to moving children towards discipline and commitment in a precise manner to implement directives and etiquette, and rids them of unjustified stubbornness... We do not call for the radicalization of beating and its permissibility in the educational process, but rather we consider it a realistic and effective measure, which the educator may need. After he has exhausted all educational measures in teaching, directing and counseling the child.

Provided that the disciplinary beating results from an educational diagnosis and awareness and not from a psychological release of the father’s or mother’s anger or emotion.

Not every beating is unacceptable and not every beating is correct.

In order for the beating to be the result of rational motives aimed at guidance and discipline, three conditions must be taken into account before relying on the beating as a disciplinary measure:

The first condition: We must convey what we want to the child’s mind, so that we are sure that he has understood our prohibition or command, and this is what many fathers and mothers are not good at, and they must master it. Because the child’s level of understanding is simple and naive, and because he does not understand many of the abstract concepts that mothers and fathers try to guide their children on, such as shame, forbidden, and duty, and this is dangerous...

Before hitting, we must clearly define for the child what we want or forbid him to do. For example, you want him not to play with electricity. Define that for him so that he understands that by identifying a physical image in front of him, and then determine for him the alternative, which is to play with something similar to an electric switch, that is not dangerous for him, such as a broken piece of equipment.

The second condition: The level and age of the child must be taken into account, and the condition for which the child is to be evaluated is a matter left to the discretion of the parents and educators. It is best to use this procedure at the age of six and above, and it is not permissible below this age.

The third condition: The form, manner, and amount of beating must be determined. There should be no physical or psychological damage, such as a wound or redness on the skin. This is unacceptable, or it will make the child terrified and trembling! This, in addition to its being forbidden according to Islamic law, is considered something unacceptable. In fact, a suggestive deterrent is sufficient, such as if the father or mother appears in a way that suggests they are about to hit him. Let the hitting be in places that do not affect the child’s health and safety, such as slapping him on the palm of his hand. On his shoulder or palms, without using other tools to hit, such as a stick or sharp objects, as this is impermissible and highly unacceptable.

After observing these conditions, the father or mother can use beating as a disciplinary measure away from abusing their children. They can follow up a case of disciplinary beating by hugging and kissing him and making him understand that the punishment was for his benefit and that they love him and hope to see him as good and obedient.