Routine household chores and expenses come first on the list of issues that spark disagreements within the family. Perhaps you think that your son should help with household chores; you may also realize that your son needs some money of his own, especially as he grows older and becomes more independent. Do you have to pay him to do the housework? If yes, how much do you have to pay him? In the event of a negative response, what should you do about giving him an allowance and expecting cooperation from him?
Homework war
Housework is more than the jobs you expect your child to do (whining and whining all the time). Housework and family work are opportunities for your son to learn that he is a contributing member of the family, that he can help others, and that he has useful abilities and skills. Housework will help him learn to plan in advance, follow up on his work until the end, and organize his time. Housework can also turn into a power struggle as you try to force your son to do what is required of him.
• Necessary information
Household chores may be your top priority, but your son is unlikely to share your opinion. Would the average ten-year-old boy prefer to clean his room instead of playing outside with his friends? Let your son know that helping with household chores is part of being a family, then work together to develop a plan.
When your child is old enough to help you regularly with household chores, consider holding a family meeting to discuss each person's responsibilities. Let the beginning be simple: it is easy to gain your son’s cooperation when you and your son are not stressed. Make sure to determine when each task should be completed and talk to him about it. You can set a schedule for family tasks or any other reminder plan, but it is preferable to avoid money and rewards (we will talk more about this later).
You will find that your son shows greater willingness to cooperate when he participates in decision-making about businesses and programs, and for this reason family meetings succeed. Your son may hate dusting, but he won't refuse to vacuum the carpets or mow the lawn. Creating a plan together (and reviewing it from time to time) will help you avoid pointless discussions. Housework is a practical way for your child to learn how capable he really is.
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