11:42:27 
2023-05-24 
615
I don't want to scare you, but it is assumed that when your son reaches eighteen years of age - if not before - he will have become an adult who is wise and sensible enough to make his own decisions; He makes friends, establishes a life of his own, makes his bed, and can walk through the streets of his city without getting lost. Yes, your job will be done then.
If you feed your four-year-old yourself, and put the textbooks in his bag when he's fourteen, he'll struggle when he gets older and won't be able to take care of himself. So don't do anything to your child that he can do himself; This does not only apply to tidying up their rooms or doing homework for them (I personally find that my eight-year-olds can do their homework better than I can for them, it also includes giving them the opportunity to cook meals for the family from time to time, for a start (From the age of ten, even if meals are limited to toast and peas. They also have to understand how the washing machine works, wake themselves up to do whatever work is required of them on the day off, and pack their bags for trips).
But this is not the most important thing, but the most important thing is that you teach your children two specific skills, and the earlier the better, namely: the ability to control their spending of money, and the ability to make their own decisions.
If you control all their financial affairs from A to Z; So that you don't give them but the little they need for their expenses, they won't learn anything that way. What is better than that is to make them, as they get older, more responsible for the expenses of their clothes, for example, or to give them a small allowance and make them earn the rest of the money they need. I have a friend who acts with his children as if he was their (bank); So that he gives them huge benefits on the money they save and not spent in vain. There are many ways to teach your children the value of money - the important thing is to find the means that suit you and your children.
Of course, you have to teach your children how to make their own decisions, from choosing clothes at the age of two to choosing special-level materials when they are in secondary school. They must learn how to plan their lives, and this also includes learning how to bear the bad consequences of their decisions; So don't get involved if you see your kids making a big mistake, but of course you can give them advice - although you'll need to wait for advice to be sought from you as they get older - but don't put any pressure on them - okay? This is their life. Just remember that you are counting the time left until they reach adulthood, and when they reach adulthood, they will take complete control of their lives.
They must learn how to plan their lives, and this also includes learning how to bear the bad consequences of their decisions.
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